Just when you thought it was OK to call Restless Leg Syndrome (RLS) a “real” medical condition that affects mostly women, here comes another syndrome (no, disorder! whatever!) besetting women: Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder or PGAD. And Paxil may help treat it (you can read Ed Silverman’s post “Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder – A Pill, Please” to find out more about that).

At first, when reading Ed’s post, I thought this was about a condition affecting men. I’ve heard that men think of sex about once every 4 seconds. I’m sexually aroused right now just writing about this stuff. And no, I’m not talking about “priapism,” which IS a real medical condition affecting men (who may be taking too much Viagra).

Nope. It’s not about male persistent sexual arousal, which is a normal state for us guys (and we don’t need no stinkin’ pill for it either!). It’s about women, some of whom need to masturbate repeatedly to deal with PGAD. One woman claims to have rejected her husband because she “treasured any time she was not feeling aroused.” Maybe less masturbation would help?

This story was picked up on MSNBC.com, which used the image shown here (above) to illustrate the story. I find it oddly disturbing, don’t you?

I’m thinking this story is part of the opening PR/marketing salvo by the folks at GSK, the drug company that manufactures and markets Paxil, as they collect clinical data to support a PGAD indication for the drug.

GSK, you recall, is the same company that brought us Requip for RLS! Coincidence? I think not!

Right now, the Requip ad agency may be hard at work coming up with the Paxil/PGAD TV DTC ads that may take a page or two from the Requip/RLS ads. Here’s my concept of the storyboard.

[Woman looks up into the camera. Ominous, mysterious music in background.]

“It was so frustrating. Like an urge I couldn’t satisfy.

[Cut to woman in bed next to man — assumed to be her husband. Woman is wriggling under the sheets with her hand down her pajama bottoms.]

“Night after night, strange feelings of arousal in my genitals kept me from falling asleep.”

[Woman angrily tosses sheet up and over her male companion — as if HE were to blame — and gets up out of bed.]

“I had to get up and really masturbate when all I wanted to do was get out of this awful relationship!”

[Cut to woman in kitchen with a friend who shows her an “independent” article in Woman’s Day magazine about “Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder”. She sees the article and it is as if a light went off in her head.]

“I had PGAD – Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder!”

[Etc, etc; her doctor confirms it; symptoms worse whenever her husband WASN’T AROUND or at night when she was dreaming about OTHER men (or women, who knows!).]

[Cut to profile close-up of doctor’s lips moving.]

“And then he said something else. PAXIL!”

[Background music changes to pleasant tune, very soothing. Side effects; etc., etc.]

[Cut to final scene. Woman riding bicycle with very hard, narrow seat down a country lane.]

“Thanks to Paxil, PGAD is not a problem any longer. Riding my bike also helps. And I got rid of my loser husband!”

[Fade to black.]

Let the hate comments come in!